My Protein Drink Catastrophe

It started like any other morning. I was sitting in the living room with my protein drink, and my mineral water drink Donna makes for me every morning, sitting next to me on the coffee table. I reached for the mineral water drink first to take a sip from the straw and set it back down on the coffee table. As I brought my hand back, I caught the straw and dumped the mineral water into my lap, into my chair and all over the floor. After grabbing a towel to clean up my mess, I bumped the coffee table and dumped the protein shake as well.

I stood there frustrated, embarrassed, and muttering under my breath, “Of course. Typical. I’m such a klutz.” Donna came in to inspect the catastrophe and graciously proceeded to help me clean up my mess.  The living room looked like a chocolate milk bomb had gone off. Totally dejected, I told her I was going back to bed.

As I laid there in bed, feeling sorry for myself, the Lord met me.

Not audibly, not with fire or thunder, but in that quiet whisper that cuts deeper than anything else. He asked me, “Why do you call yourself a klutz? I did not create you to be a klutz in your mother's womb.  Where did that come from?”

Suddenly, I was back in my mind, seven years old again. I had just spilled my milk in a family's living room on their brand new carpet. It wasn’t intentional—it never is at that age—but the reaction was swift and humiliating. I was told to sit in a plastic kiddie pool placed in the middle of the living room, so that if I spilled again, at least it wouldn’t make a mess.

That moment branded me. Not physically—but in my identity. A lie crept in unnoticed and took root: “I am clumsy. I make messes. I am an accident waiting to happen.” And I carried that false identity, quietly, through years of life. Laughing it off sometimes. Other times, feeling shame when I broke something, made a mess or stumbled and fell.

But it wasn’t true. It was never true.

In the aftermath of my protein drink fiasco, I realized I had allowed a childhood moment to define me far too long. The Lord wasn’t accusing me—He was freeing me. He showed me the lie I had agreed with and invited me to see myself differently.

The Lord took me to Psalm 144:1-2…

"Praise the LORD, who is my rock.

He trains my hands for war

and gives my fingers skill for battle

He is my loving ally and my fortress,

my tower of safety, my rescuer.

He is my shield, and I take refuge in him”.

He said, “You’re not an accident. you are a bold freedom fighter with hands equipped for war and fingers equipped for battle. You are intentional. You are stable, careful, capable, and created in My image.”

Then the Lord showed me the physical affliction I’m currently experiencing in my back, causing me to be unable to walk or maintain my balance resulting from this false identity I had taken on. My physical body was literally manifesting my, “accident looking for a place to happen”, by deteriorating my lower back and legs to the point where I could no longer stand or walk.

God revealed to me what needed to be healed.  Walking in my true identity as a  battle ready bold freedom fighter will cause my physical body to come into alignment with who God designed for me to be.  As I learn to walk and stand in my true identity, my physical body will be restored to the function it was designed to be by my creator.